RULE OR BE RULED

What endeared me to Amelia Peabody was her seemingly progressive idea of female autonomy and her desire not to be shut away in marriage. Yet, some women (and even some men) enjoy entrusting their lives to their respective spouses. This I have never understood.

I moved 2,000 miles from my small childhood town when I was nineteen. This same fear of being ruled or ruling another was ever present when I looked around at those I grew up with. Like Amelia, I ventured into a different place (although not another country) to find my purpose and, similarly, found a more than adequate partner.

My difficulty lay in finding a man who was unafraid of a female opinion, could argue toe-to-toe, and could take on some traditional masculine roles. My goal was never to exclude a man from my life, but I was determined that only a man with self-confidence and humility would provide the necessary balance.